Stanley Siegel, LCSW, is a psychotherapist, author, international lecturer, and former Director of Education at New York’s renowned Ackerman Institute for Family Therapy. With over 45 years of experience, Siegel has developed an unconventional and highly regarded approach to psychotherapy. Stanley’s latest book, “Your Brain on Sex: How Smarter Sex Can Change Your Life” is out now!

The Soul of Therapy

The Soul of Therapy

Our Problems Are Our Solutions. As I continue to teach and lecture among my colleagues around the world, I have become increasingly aware that most psychotherapists train and practice within a paradigm that sees patients’ problems as rooted in pathology. These therapists wait and watch for a symptom to see how  it  might fit...
Intelligent Lust: It's More than Just Great Sex,

Intelligent Lust: It’s More than Just Great Sex,

It’s Smart Sex. Step Six: Acting Out Sexual Fantasies If you’ve followed the steps of Intelligent Lust this far, by now you’ve gained an understanding of your true sexual desires and their meaning and purpose in your life. You may have even met someone with whom you share the likelihood...
Cracking The Code of Sexual Chemistry

Cracking The Code of Sexual Chemistry

Using sexual chemistry to guide you to the right partner Step 4 of Intelligent Lust: Cracking the Code of Sexual Chemistry We’ve all had the experience of seeing someone on the street or in a social setting and feeling an instant attraction. Our eyes lock, our pulse races, everyone else...
How Sex Heals

How Sex Heals

Embarking on the journey of Intelligent Lust. Scientists agree that frequent sex can improve heart health, build a more robust immune system, and increase the ability to ward off pain. Sex changes brain and body chemistry, boosting certain hormone levels that keep us young and vibrant. Sex can also alter...
What Do Our Fantasies Say About the Past?

What Do Our Fantasies Say About the Past?

Where do our fantasies and erotic images come from and what do they tell us about the deeper nature of who we are? We have been led to believe that our sexual fantasies are random imaginings, but nothing could be further from the truth. At their base lies fragments of...
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The Soul of Therapy

The Soul of Therapy

Our Problems Are Our Solutions. As I continue to teach and lecture among my colleagues around the world, I have become increasingly aware that most psychotherapists train and practice within a paradigm that sees patients’ problems as rooted in pathology. These therapists wait and watch for a symptom to see how  it  might fit into a a category of...
A Dangerous Method: Can Sex Restore Mental Health?

A Dangerous Method: Can Sex Restore Mental Health?

Sexual Desire in Therapy The newly released film “A Dangerous Method” tells the story of the complex relationship between Sigmund Freud and his much younger heir-apparent, Carl Jung, both early founders of the modern field of psychology. Freud and Jung came to represent differing schools of psychoanalytic thinking, a separation not only hastened by intellectual...
Forbidden Desire: The Cost of Living Without Sex

Forbidden Desire: The Cost of Living Without Sex

Sexual denial never succeeds and sexual desire can never be buried. Why do some of us choose to live without sex? What is the emotional cost of sexual abstinence to parts of our lives? The secret life story of former FBI Director J. Edgar Hoover, a closeted gay man,  told in the new Clint Eastwood bio-pic, tragically...
When Too Much Sex Is Bad for You

When Too Much Sex Is Bad for You

  When is sex bad for you? Among mental health professionals, that question is hotly debated. Definitions of sexual pathology can range from sex that crosses legal lines to any form of sex involving humiliation or self-harm that leads to lowered self-esteem. And there’s just as much disagreement about what constitutes “compulsive” or “addictive” sex or even if such...
Fact or Fantasy: Men and Women Are Sexually Alike

Fact or Fantasy: Men and Women Are Sexually Alike

Regardless of gender, sexual fantasies are windows into our psyches. My daughter Alyssa, a psychotherapist in Portland, Oregon, knows me well enough to question and even challenge my thinking where other colleagues might not. Despite my thirty-six years of practice, Alyssa is able to introduce me to the latest scientific thinking and research and, with freshness and excitement,...
What We Can Do When Sex Leaves a Relationship: Making Sex Positive Choices

What We Can Do When Sex Leaves a Relationship: Making Sex Positive Choices

Brinking Sex Back Part Three: Crossing Conventional Boundaries Most of us, gay and straight alike, feel that having a life-long partner is preferable to going through life alone or with a series of affairs or short-term relationships. There is much in our culture that supports this notion, from the large number of tax benefits given...
What We Can Do When Sex Leaves A Relationship: Alternatives to Monogamy

What We Can Do When Sex Leaves A Relationship: Alternatives to Monogamy

Learning boundaries with an open relationship Part Two: Creating an Open Relationship The process of learning Intelligent Lust is not about immediate gratification. For those of us who follow the steps, sex matures as we discover the deeper subtleties of our own and our partners erotic desires. As past conflicts heal, desires can change, too. ...
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